You know how it is – to fell like knocking his teeth out or seize him by the hair during your argument? You are not alone.
Bonnie Eaker Weil, the author of the bestseller Make Up, Don’t Break Up offers you four effective exit strategies out of the crisis with a loved one.
It appears; the feelings of hatred, anger and disgust are just as natural for the two of you like talking about love or cuddling. That’s because these polar feelings are produced by the same brain area. And that is why even seemingly perfect couples quarrel like in an action movie.
Less words
All attempts to “reach out” to him during a violent quarrel are doomed to failure. Be wiser, click pause. A timely surrender is not an escape from the battle, but the only way to prevent a “nervous agony” of both.
Nothing Personal
Insulting each other in turn will bring no good, and will not resolve the problem. Try to soften the blow. Instead of “You are so lazy!” say how much you need his help and support.
Struggle for equality
Do not forget that your overall goal is to find a way out of the conflict, and not to blame the partner for all sins. Fixing on your rightness disarms and blinds you. Learn to see not only his errors, but your own, as well.
Be positive
Random touch, harmless jokes and flapping eyelashes are the proven techniques that can pin your “beast” to the mat, even in the midst of an argument. But no sarcasm, do not forget you are a couple.