Man’s temperament best predicts whether a marriage will be happy.
Man’s happiness and his health are more important for marriage than women’s optimism: it has been shown by a new psychological study conducted at the University of Chicago. The long term forecast for the couples is as follows: if the husband has a neurotic character, the wife is less likely to be happy and satisfied with the marriage.
In the course of the study, married people described their temperament, psychological characteristics and the atmosphere in the family. Scientists noticed that the wives of neurotic men with unstable emotions expressed the maximum number of claims to the spouses. On the other hand, men cared much less about the situation in the family, even if a woman felt neurotic.
James Iveniuk, the author of the study, told about the study’s results. The wives of neurotic men often reported scandals and conflicts with their husbands. In that case, neither a woman’s optimism, nor her health seemed to affect the married life much. Scientists have found no differences in the quality of men’s lives, despite the large number of study participants: they studied the psychology of 953 strong couples living together for 39 years in average. Among the participants, there were married and cohabitating couples aged from 63 to 90 years.
Linda Waite, the director of the Center on Aging, said the study could be described as one question, “How much does your spouse bother you?” The main marital problems revealed by the study were not violence and quarrels, but the partner’s criticism, overrated expectations and requests, and just getting on each other’s nerves. The more positive your husband is about you and everything that happens to your family, the greater the chance that the marriage will bring happiness, and you will still be together at 90.
Despite the fact that more women complained of marital problems, their level of psychological support and willingness to help the spouse was significantly higher than that of men! Among men’s traits helping to prolong marriage are being unbiased, honest, extroverted, the ability to say “yes,” high anxiety, and the desire to earn the appreciation of others.