Now you’ve got a boyfriend, did you have to face signs of resentment on the part of his friends? Did they give you to understand that you’re unwelcome among them? Then you find yourself in a predicament. Your boyfriend’s friends are unwilling to accept your love, and may probably influence him in a way you don’t want them to, for you mean your love to grow. Is there a way to settle the situation to your liking? Yes, but first you’ve got to understand the reasons for this resentment.
Why should the guys dislike you when they know that their friend is happy with you and wants this to go on for a long time?
They are unwilling to let anyone into their close circle, let alone a woman. While you are an important person in your boyfriend’s life, it doesn’t go for them. They won’t accept the bond readily. While things are going smoothly between you and your boyfriend, all is well and good, but try and find out whether there are any concerns that you need to know and do something about.
He begins to spend less time in their company
Well, it’s perfectly understandable and inevitable, right? You would most likely feel the same when your BFF finds herself a fellow and starts to turn down all your invitations and plans because she wants to be with him. Yet, it is easily remedied. Keep it in balance and give your boyfriend chances to see his friends now and then. Let them know that you don’t intend to keep him for yourself solely.
They may be feeling superior
Strangely, it happens more often than you may think. They may pick out something that shows you’re not really up to their mark, harp on it and begin to dislike you on those grounds. Is it that they refuse to take you along when they are about to hang out? If it’s so, don’t think you are obliged to play along with them and go out on a limb in order to impress them. You are sure they believe you to be inferior? Stop thinking about them and pay attention to your boyfriend.
He has changed and they mind it
Your meeting could have changed your boyfriend, and these changes came as unexpected for his set of friends. They want their pal back as he was and they may think you’re messing him around. Now this is the point you need to take up with your boyfriend, he may want to broach this question with his friends and put it across that he is the same person even if changed somewhat and they ought to understand and accept the situation.
They feel they are no longer insiders in the company
When you’re spending time with your boyfriend and his friends, look at them – do they feel part of the company or it is that you and your boyfriend are together, and they stay on the fringe as some tolerated addition? Once you’re in their circle, take care to hobnob with everybody present and not just with your boyfriend. Let them draw you into their conversations and situations.
Do they believe you to want to gain control over their friend?
It’s a thing that happens fairly often. Do you believe that if your boyfriend agrees with you in everything, it is the sign of his love? Meanwhile his friends see it as an attempt to take him under your thumb. They will naturally start hating you for that. Make sure you don’t keep your boyfriend on a short leash. When he’s with his friends, don’t call him to find out where he is and what he is doing, his friends will take a dim view of that.
They feel protective towards their friend
That is a common friendship feature when pals protect one another from what they consider to be undue external influence. This time you are this external influence, arriving to break their friend away from them and possibly use him. Naturally enough, it will take a lot of accepting and living down.
They were probably fond of his previous girlfriend
Although it’s very bad for you, you aren’t to blame for it in any case. Even if they understand the reasons behind the break-up, they may still be wanting her back if she set herself to be a good companion for them. They will need time to realize that you’re here to stay and take you as you are without comparing you to anyone else.
They feel dispirited around you
When you are hanging out with your boyfriend and his crowd, look carefully to see how his friends feel in your presence. Is it that they are uncomfortable with you around? There may be something in your manners or manner of speaking that puts them out. It’s quite all right to remark on it and ask what is it that makes them feel bad.
They hold you as an inferior person undeserving of their friend
Of course they think much of their friend and want somebody especially stunning for him – maybe you failed to sweep them off their feet in the first place. Again, it’s no fault of yours, the best bet is to bide your time and probably convince them in your worth.
They envy him and want you for themselves
It happens now and then! And it will surely stir up a great deal of hate. You struck them so that they want to replace him by your side. If you feel this may be your case, there’s only one way out of the situation: stop meeting them, thus showing them that they have no chances to get your boyfriend out of the picture!