Faking Orgasm: Reasons and Consequences


Just don’t say you never did it. According to the statistical data sex experts reluctantly provide, 10% of all orgasms are fake. But many women can tell you that real rate is much higher. Why do we fake? Where can it lead to? Do men spot the deception? Is it safe to fake orgasm? Find the answers below. Well, why and what for do women fake orgasm?

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To finish it all quicker

It’s the most common reason. Woman can fake orgasm to create visual excitement and turn the partner on even more. It gives a man “conclusive evidence” he did a good job and now could get a satisfying reward. Perhaps, she didn’t really want to have sex or she had to agree because of some circumstances. It might be that her child is ill and she can hear him coughing behind the wall. It could be anything – tough day at work, bad stretch in life or even spiritual change. Fed up with obligations imposed by outside world – professional, social or any other demands – she is seeking refugee in her own little world but finds yet another obligations instead!

Don’t want to hurt

He was so nice and attentive – flowers, dinner, candles, romantic words and sophisticated caresses. It is not his fault I’m not in the right mood. No, this one’s even better: his efforts should be rewarded! To put it simply, it’s not fair. But some women disagree: he pretended to be interested, she pretended to be satisfied. Even Steven?

I’m afraid to seem undersexed

Many men unreasonably believe (and many women too) that women should be like Hollywood characters. They think if woman is really sexy, she should be crazy about it. Her eyes shine, her passionate mouth is slightly open, her silky hair flow down her shoulders… Commonly, this type, roughly speaking, is “valued” higher than the others.

The question is whether you want to be just another clone who will do anything to make an impression or you want to be yourself and have sex when you want it.

Do Men Spot Simulated Orgasm?

It depends. The thing is every person and every orgasm is unique. This means your today’s the two hundred and thirty fifth orgasm is different. So is different the way it feels. Many men are misguided by mass media or their friends and expect a woman to have the reactions they think can tell if she had orgasm or not. That’s why most men don’t even guess their wives are faking orgasm.

Is Faking Orgasm Unhealthy?

Unfortunately, yes. Physiologically, every woman needs orgasm. Psychologically, laziness, even in bed, suppressing one’s emotions and feelings will do you no good. If you are a chronic orgasm faker, your partner will either guess it or perceives the discordance unconsciously. And that’s bad and could turn into problems.

Well, maybe we should be honest? Perhaps we should simply say we don’t want sex when we really don’t – even if it might hurt the partner. Learn how to get sexual satisfaction and share with your partner and you won’t have to deceive him in bed.


  1. I’ve never lied to my husband, that is, I’ve never faked orgasm. He almost always knows how to “warm me up” and how to give me orgasm, and even when he doesn’t manage to I always tell the truth and we use other ways to achieve it. Faking orgasm is silly. Just tell your partner how you like it.

  2. I completely agree with Paula. Usually my girlfriend and I have great sex. Part of the reason for that is I’m cursed/blessed with a one-track mind. So I usually start focused “outward” on her pleasure. In this mode I can’t orgasm myself, but I can wind her up really, really well and I have pretty much unlimited endurance. For me it’s like a prolonged sex tease and I like it when she orgasms. It makes me feel powerful to hold her at that moment when she lets go. I enjoy that nearly as much as my own orgasm.

    At some point though I have to switch gears and go “inward”. Sometimes this requires a short break, perhaps a change of position. Now she orgasms usually just once, but very hard. And afterward she loses some of her energy. She sometimes compensates for that by “mirror-syncing” up with me. It’s not faking since we both know what she’s doing….it’s more like play acting. She starts matching my sub-verbal cues and rhythms then adding to them to basically “rev” me up. Think of it as a jockey urging on her mount although technically she the one being…..well, maybe that wasn’t such a good example. *LOL* But I think you get the idea.

    But if you’re really in tune with you’re partner, many times you can see when the passion drops out. A distraction at the wrong moment, and uncomfortable position, or a bad rhythm are some of the causes. Some times she just “taps out”. Basically that’s our signal that she lost her passion, but I should go for mine if I can. This all works because we are honest with each other and usually we just need a little more foreplay or a little pillow talk to reset the mood. We don’t get in a hurry and we don’t get discourage and in the end we both usually get at least one good, honest, orgasm each. I like to think we make it more about the whole journey than just “crossing the finish line.”

    Frankly, she ends up getting more orgasms than me, but she enjoys having sex more often so over all, I believe I’m getting way more sex than I would with being more selfish.

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