Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder: Signs and Symptoms

Not all people who have BPD – borderline personality disorder – realize that they live with a medical condition, but they do. With a quiet form of BPD people just brood on their emotions and thoughts inside without any wish to display them, and it seems all right; but with a “high-functioning” BPD these emotions can get violent and intense, and still remain played out inside the person, often giving them a hell of a time!

So, BPD qualifies as a mental health condition to be encountered in roughly 1.6% of the community. People affected have unstable behavior and quick-changing moods. There was a time when therapists believed BPD was incurable, and the condition was consequently open to stigmatization. Times have changed, though, and we have effective treatments helping to take the strain off day-to-day life; also, some sort of remission is achievable when a person eventually doesn’t tote up to the diagnosis criteria.

What signs can mean a case of Quiet BPD?

  • Even when inner feelings become extremely painful, you remain calm, and people have no clue to know that you are burning up inside.
  • All of a sudden you experience violent mood swings unrelated to what is going on.
  • You are so accustomed to concealing your anger that at times you are not sure whether you really feel anger or not.
  • You accuse yourself of failings without stopping to think whose fault it really is or can be.
  • By the same token, in conflicts, you jump to the conclusion that you are in the wrong and misbehaved.
  • You believe strongly in maintaining a calm and cool appearance and looking successful.
  • You cannot very well control your behavior although you may realize that it may backfire badly in situations like compulsive eating, burning money, engaging in sex, or driving under influence.
  • You are liable to succumb to inflicting self-harm, attempting suicide, driven by overwhelming emotions.
  • You believe things are badly wrong with you and you often blunder.
  • You are always in retreat within yourself and under pressure, it can grow so deep that you find yourself dissociated.
  • You often feel devoid of feelings and empty inside.
  • The thought of abandonment puts fear into you, even if it is imagined.
  • Your relationships are always (or nearly always) too high-strung and therefore liable to totter.
  • You fail to grasp a clear-cut notion of your own identity, your self-image is shifting all the time.
  • Being upset by somebody, you don’t try to clear the atmosphere or sort out the issue, but retreat. If the conflict was too strident, you may break contact with the real or imaginary offender without notifying the person.
  • You assume that others find you burdensome.
  • With new people, you can begin with idealizing them only to get disappointed in them later. Then you feel alone and insecure.

What does the condition actually imply?

First, it doesn’t imply that it is an official diagnosis; quiet BPD is really a sort of a subtype. Psychologist Theodore Millon even came up with the name the “discouraged subtype” of BPD, accentuating its mild nature. Due to that, QBPD is rather elusive to be discerned. People around you fail to notice that you conceal your moods and feelings from them carefully. Yet your behaviors continue to leap up and drop down, often affecting your relationships with coworkers and friends – when you are down, you believe everyone is going to abandon you.

What is the difference between BPD and quiet BPD?

Most major symptoms of both conditions are the same with the only difference that quiet BPD makes the afflicted go out of their way to conceal the symptoms. Consequently, they suffer from agonizing onrushes of real or imaginary shame, fury, or guilt.

Such people try to control out-of-hand behaviors by stifling their moods or by withdrawing from people and going into retreat.

Having quiet BPD means that your self-esteem isn’t up to the mark. You experience bouts of anger and anxiety. Your depression is so heavy on you that you are apt to inflict harm on yourself, contemplate suicide and discuss it aloud.

Quiet BPD brings onsets of self-shame or guilt which may lead to attempts of self-destruction when the feelings grow too strong to be just stowed away quietly.

Overpowered by puissant feelings, people can seek relief in inflicting wounds or drinking, or taking heavy drugs.

Also, while with BPD emotions are not always rigidly controlled, with quiet BPD emotions are not given many chances to surface.

Actually, all kinds of BPD are characterized by raging inner tumults, but those having quiet BPD do their best not to let them show – which ends up in their keeping their distance, staying aloof and reserved and even appearing totally cold-hearted.

Customarily BPD is an adult ailment, although at times adolescents of 18 and younger can be found to have it. But to be properly diagnosed, young ones have to display the related symptoms for a year or more.

How can BPD be treated?

While BPD was believed incurable some time ago, now ways have been found to alleviate and weaken the condition to an impressive extent. Many distressed people have been treated with remarkable success.

Dialectical behavioral approach

One kind of treatment is known as Dialectical behavioral therapy. DBT is the brainchild of psychologist Marsha Linehan and is now looked upon as the standard treatment for BPD. This particular therapy is aimed at training you to come to terms with unwelcome and overpowering emotions.

Mentalization-based approach

Mentalization-based treatment is about developing a deeper understanding of what goes on inside you. Besides, this therapy includes techniques for developing empathy so that you can get a glimpse of other peoples’ feelings and attitudes.

Treatment with medication

BPD doesn’t yield to some particular medication; mostly, meds are used to alleviate certain symptoms. When moods are turbulent and want to calm down, it can be achieved by giving medicine. Tote out your symptoms to a specialist and they may advise you on the medication that may be taken during the most strident emotional episodes.

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