Let’s figure out how to build communication with colleagues and management competently so that you are heard. We can also tell you which phrases will help you achieve what you want, and which, on the contrary, will turn employees away from you.
NLP techniques allow you to achieve mutual understanding, pleasure from communication, a sense of closeness with the interlocutor – and, as a result, move together towards solving the problem.
Let’s take a look at examples of how you can improve communication with employees by introducing a few simple rules from NLP into it.
Apply echo phrases
Repeat part of the statement after the interlocutor when you begin to formulate the answer. It can be a special word that occurs only in his speech, or the most informative part of a sentence.
For example (echo phrases are in italics):
A: I would like to change the position.
B: What position are you considering?
A: I would like to work more with people rather than sit at the monitor all day long.
B: What position do you think meets the criterion to communicate more with people and not sit at the monitor all day long?
A: I think it might be a promotion manager.
B: There is no promotion manager position in our company, but a customer service manager meets the stated criteria. Will you consider this position?
Talk about the subject of discussion, not the person
If you want to fix someone’s work, use only the third person pronouns and try to depersonalize the process.
You might say, for example, “This presentation needs revision on slides 4 and 7. The first two phrases should be removed, and the key slogan needs rewriting.”
WRONG: “Edit your presentation, it’s worthless, and slides 4 and 7 do not match our guides. Do you know exactly what needs to be done?”
Avoid rhetorical questions
They only heat up the situation, create an unnecessary emotional background and certainly do not speed up the process, just hanging in the air. Their task is to decorate speech and ironicize, and in a business conversation, phrases that induce action are much more effective.
Your words should have a real equivalent that can be seen, heard, felt on the skin, or, at worst, tasted. If you are specific in a conversation with the interlocutor, he has a better chance of understanding you correctly and interpreting your words with minimal distortion.
For example, it would be wrong to say, “Do something with the website.” Anything means what? In which direction to move? Correct the mistakes in the text? Replace the product photos with more up-to-date ones? Or transfer to another domain?
It would be better like this: “On the homepage of the website, in the “Buy” section, there is a letter missing in the word… You need to add it today by 15:00.” (It is also worthwhile to indicate the required action and indicate the deadlines).
After all, this is the only way to make sure that you understand everything correctly. Do not hesitate to say: “What did you mean when you said…”, “Did I understand correctly that…” or “Explain it to me in a different way, please, I do not quite get it.” This minimizes the likelihood of errors.
Speak good things first
Remember that feedback has an important rule: we remember the last phrases and the last questions. Therefore, for a productive dialogue, first tell us about what you like in the work done, not forgetting to speak impersonally, and only after that suggest what to change or add.
For example, it would be true to say: “The last two parts of the presentation are well-written, but the first one should describe the advantages of our project in more detail.”
WRONG: “You started your presentation poorly and did not explain the benefits of our project well.”
Even for the most insignificant things. Employees often complain that management does not appreciate their work (according to statistics, only 21% of employees admit that their work is highly valued), and this is not only about the salary. It’s also a matter of the human factor.
Therefore, even if you are not happy with the result, start your speech with the words of gratitude or praise because your employees applied their skills and spent time on the task. In this case, your dialogue is unlikely to turn into a confrontation, and you are more likely to come to a solution that suits both.
For example, you shouldn’t say, “Your work is worthless! Everything needs to be rewritten there!”
It is better to say: “Thank you for submitting the report on time. Chapter 4 is well prepared, but in Chapters 2 and 3 you need to add a graph about website traffic.”
By applying these simple rules, you will very quickly see positive changes: things will begin to be resolved faster, and employees will feel your good attitude towards them, which will certainly affect work efficiency. At the same time, mind that there is no room for any manipulation here.