Many women are moved by the fact they have two children – a child and a husband. For some time they do not see anything wrong with that. And they are not even aware of the fact their nagging affects not only the spouse but the whole relationship.
‘My husband needs to be told everything a hundred times again and again – to be sure. He is able to die of starvation near a full fridge!’ Such women’s complaints are not uncommon. We do not believe that at least one similar case of death was recorded in the police reports. But one thing we know for sure – when a woman behaves like a ‘mommy’, it is dangerous for her mental and sexual health.
First, when you always treat your husband like a child, you risk to forget about quality sex. At best, at a moment’s notice it will turn into dull reciprocating movements under a blanket in the dark.
Second, psychologists say that the desire to control another person, driven to the absurd, is transformed into the desire to kill the object of supervision: in this case you will not have to worry that he will sooner or later break off the leash on which he is being held. Do you want to learn it from your own experience?
So below you’ll find eight tips on how not to become a mom for your husband out of his beloved wife.
- In the morning, do not behave as if your husband was a kindergarten child, which you are giving away to a hostile educator with a pain in your heart. No need to straighten his collar or scarf, give him a handkerchief and ask the same question, ‘Honey, have you got the key, money, cell phone?’
- Do not try to control him. Never force him to tell you with whom and about what he has just talked on the phone, and what the interlocutor has replied him. Otherwise instead of a docile boy-husband you will get a teenager who will tell you a thousand lies just to ensure that you are not poking your nose into his affairs and do not infringe on the sacred – his liberty.
- ‘Call me when you come, or I’ll worry’, ‘Do not drink coffee on an empty stomach, get something to eat’, ‘Do not stay too long!’ – delete these and similar phrases from your vocabulary, and do not cluck over your husband like a hen, if you want to keep passion in your relationship.
- Do not drive your man into a corner when it comes to any plans. Leave him a chance to maneuver – do not decide for two, where and how you’ll spend your free time.
- Do not make him accountable for any period of time which he spent without you, unless the man himself does not mind sharing it with you (if you got married recently, it makes sense to discuss family life to avoid confusion).
- Do not ask your beloved for one and the same thing more than two times. Otherwise he will automatically ‘turn off’ and ignore your words, and automatically ‘turn on’ in the end of your fiery speech.
- Remember that when a man takes you and your care for granted (the sun is shining, the TV is working, you are cooking dinner, washing, cleaning – providing full service), you will awaken in him the same feeling that he has for his mother but not the beloved woman.
- And most important thing – from time to time behave so that your man will have the desire to take care of you.