11 Things to Tell a Depressed Man

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Depression and anxiety appear regardless of your sex, but it does not mean that men and women experience it the same way. Today we will talk about depression from the male point of view.

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1. You are not weak

We are surrounded by liars. Our culture glorifies masculinity. The world is supposedly uninterested in knowing how you feel. It downplays the importance of women and minorities, but at the same time causes damage to men. Beyond doubt.

Men are affected because from childhood they are taught not to demonstrate their feelings, say that senses have no value and they should be forgotten. Depression also lies. It whispers to you that no one really cares about you. It is incredibly difficult to overcome the stereotypical beliefs and speak frankly. But to ask for help is not weakness.

2. You can even fail to understand that you’re depressed

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Men do not talk about depression, they usually suppress their feelings. Women behave differently in this respect: according to statistics, they are twice as likely to seek professional help and receive treatment. Perhaps that’s why men are three times more likely to have problems with alcohol than women. They seek to silence their pain rather than deal with its cause. In addition, men are more likely than women to commit suicide. One can say that silence is literally killing men. But there is another way out.

3. It’s normal to be an owl

No, you’re not a lazy person. Depression is exhausting. You feel unwell, tired, sleepy, and exhausted. Most people with depression suffer from these symptoms in the morning. Most people are larks by nature. But this does not mean that you also need to be refreshed in the morning.

4. You’re not sulky by nature

Irritability is a common symptom of depression. Depression in men most often manifests itself in irritability and aggressiveness rather than just sadness. Depression is a difficult, treacherous parasite that draws on the surface the most unattractive things you have. This impostor looks like you and speaks your voice. But this is not the real you. Do not forget about it.

5. Depression mocks

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Another lie that depression whispers to you is that you’re useless and not worth anything. It destroys your self-esteem and distorts your perception of yourself. It fills your mind with pessimistic thoughts that only worsen your mood. “I’m a terrible person. I look like a nightmare. I’m not worthy of love” – these are the thoughts you may have. It is difficult to mute this voice, but you can calm it down, in fact. You can treat yourself kindly. You would not tolerate a stranger saying something like that about your friend, so do not let depression treat you this way.

6. To cancel plans is normal

Depression rarely comes alone. It occurs with other disorders: anxiety, insomnia, and social phobia. If you suffer it alone, the pressure is strengthened by friendship, relationship, and social responsibility. You think that if you do not pay enough attention to the people, they will turn away from you, and this takes away your last energy. But depression is an illness. It is normal to abandon dinner because you have the flu. It is also normal to cancel plans, if you do not feel well enough in terms of morality. Your health should be the priority. Friends will understand it, but if they don’t, they are probably not very good friends.

7. … but do not cancel all the plans

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There are many activities that are not suitable for a depressive and anxious person. For example, the idea of a surprise party will turn out a complete failure. Most group activities are also exceptionally harmful. Birthdays, New Year or Christmas parties as well as the time when the expectation of fun reaches its peak can become a nightmare.

Ask friends to inform you about the plans in advance. You need to be able to refuse. Do not agree to go, if something does not suit your mood. Fun is relative. Having fun does not mean going to the best night party ever. It can be fun to lie on the couch under a blanket and watch a movie.

8. It’s all about small steps

Depression destroys hope. It prevents you from taking the steps to restore; it does not let you see the possibility; it also deprives you of the ability to put one foot in front of the other foot. It is difficult to realize that things can get better, and it is even more challenging to understand how to achieve this.

If you can enjoy little things, you will soon be able to enjoy every day of your life. You will also find it easier to prospect into the future. The steps to recovery are not always easy, but there is nothing difficult to go through them one by one.

9. It’s normal not to want sex when depressed

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Depression affects libido. Low self-esteem and lack of energy can affect your sexual appetite and even lead to problems with erection. Some antidepressants can affect not only erection, but also the ability to reach orgasm. Together, they can transform your sex life into a real test.

A male company may often be depraved, but do not let it put you under pressure. Your friends do not sleep with women as often as they speak about it. If you have a girlfriend and you are afraid of not coping with the “responsibility”, let her know about it. Communication helps, and perhaps together you will find the solution to your problem. For example, you can always give it more attention. The two of you can build a fort out of blankets and hide inside from the rest of the world.

10. Do not run away from problems

Depression makes it difficult to lead an active life. The lack of energy, irritability, negative thoughts, and permanent cancellation of plans can bring problems to your relationship. It is important to distinguish between the disease and the individuality: you are not what your depression makes you; you are not a heavy burden. Sometimes all you need is to be alone, but you must understand that sometimes you need to interact with others – it is a small step on the road to recovery. If you do not feel the strength to do this, just meet with close friends: social groups reduce the manifestation of depressive symptoms and prevent their re-occurrence.

11. Being sad is normal

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Misconceptions and misinformation about depression are not only widespread and diverse, but also very dangerous. The people, who have never experienced such symptoms may offer such plain tips as “cheer up” or “try harder”, not realizing what negative consequences their words can lead to. Being sad is not just normal – this is a healthy state of a human being. But do not be sad all the time. There are many ways to cope with it.

Look for support from the people who understand what you have to go through. Therapy helps. It’s a slow process, where failures and difficult days are possible. But then it is getting better. You do not have to suffer alone. Do not be discouraged, stay close to those who have already experienced this feeling.

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