We are going to tell you what alarming signals in your partner’s behavior indicate that his “masculinity” has long passed into the stage of toxic masculinity (and what this really means).
Aggressive behavior towards women
When in childhood a man had an overwhelming, domineering mother who did not allow him to assert himself, a man is likely to grow up with a subconscious hatred of women. In childhood, these feelings were disguised, but the boy entered adulthood with an aggressive attitude accumulated in childhood. He perceives a woman as a danger and treats her accordingly.
If you meet a partner and notice that he endlessly criticizes other women, behaves defiantly towards them, discusses or condemns them, know that this behavior is not the norm and is rooted deep in childhood. Aggression towards the mother must be inherent in the unconscious of this man, and he practices the same attitude to other women.
Despite the fact that he can initially treat you with dignity and restraint, sooner or later, the moment will come when the toxicity of suppressed childhood will begin to spread to you as well. Pay attention to his behavior and be alert. Most often, this ailment manifests itself in criticism, which, on a subconscious level, means protection from women.
Lack of understanding harmonious relationships
If a man had a single-parent family and there was no correct example of parental relationships in his life, which is usually the norm for children, the man does not understand what a respectful relationship in a couple should be, what it is for and what it gives in the end. In his case, there is only a story where a relationship in a couple is impossible or forbidden. This is a problem that needs to be solved with a psychologist or worked out on your own.
Lack of responsibility for the relationship with a partner
When a person does not have or does not express a sense of responsibility for himself, his soul mate and the family as a whole, this speaks of an unstable institution of family and marriage in his mind. In other words, he does not know what it means to take responsibility and has not seen examples to follow.
Toxic masculinity can be called abuse. Any abuse also originates in childhood. This is a form of relationship where a man wants to suppress emotionally and physically any person close to him. Such a man inevitably strives to reduce the position and importance of each of his partners, whoever he is with.
This manifests itself in constant excessive criticism and humiliation, where his persona is vividly superior. In this position, a man is not ready to consider relationships on an equal footing with other members of society. In a healthy state, the man respects others, himself and his choice and does everything to develop himself and the society he lives in.
A man does not take care of himself and his appearance
Healthy male energy is the energy of achieving goals, the energy when a man achieves something by himself, strives, sets himself difficult tasks and certainly fulfills them. If you meet a man who does not develop and does not take care of his health, this is representative of toxic masculinity.
He wants to be always in charge in everything, he is the king and demands obedience from everyone. If you fall under his influence, turning automatically into a victim, everything that you do is not right for him. This also applies to other people, who come in contact with him. They put on the wrong clothes, look in the wrong way, cook, or serve them in the wrong way. This is a huge manifestation of toxic masculinity: on the one hand, a man shows masculinity, and on the other hand, he behaves in such a harmful way with those around him.
People with unmanifested responsibility and without the willingness to take it on are typical representatives of toxic masculinity. Such men, as a rule, are lacking in initiative, await decisions from the outside, are not independent and therefore put a woman at the head of the family.
The basic trauma associated with such behavior comes from childhood, where the mother did not give the boy opportunities for self-realization. In a relationship, such a person takes the position of a “mama’s boy” – a person who needs support. He cannot make decisions and expects a decision from his next mother, that is, from his girlfriend.
If you saw your partner in any of the above roles, there is a reason to think it over and take appropriate measures. Talk to the man, take a closer look at his behavior, try to make an appointment with a specialist who deals with such problems. If you wish to do it, you can fix a lot, and even the unconscious can be decomposed and turned to your advantage in the future.