Want to learn more about relationships? Or maybe you want to learn more about money? You’ll find a wealth of information on Black Love. From historic couples to how to obtain financial freedom, there are many topics for you to explore.
But, what if you want to know about both?
Chances are, you already know that money can be a huge stressor in any relationship. You’ve probably lived through it yourself in one or two relationships! Is there anything you can do to lessen the impact money has on you and your significant other?
Absolutely! Here’s how.
Create a Budget
Many disagreements arise because expectations aren’t clear. If you and your partner don’t know how much you’re spending, what you’re spending it on, and how much you’re saving, you can expect to get frustrated with each other more often than not.
Creating a budget with your spouse is essential to lessening the impact money has on your relationship. Include things like:
- Fixed monthly expenses
- Combined income
- Savings
- Variable expenses
- Retirement
Make sure you both talk about your money goals and make them part of your budget. For example, you may have a goal of saving up to buy a house while your spouse wants to save for a vacation. Make things easier down the road by determining how much money you’ll put into separate savings accounts for each goal.
Be Less Materialistic
The old adage, “More money, more problems” turns out to be true. Couples with more money tend to be more materialistic, and the more materialistic a couple is, the more problems they have.
Stuff just doesn’t meet our psychological needs, which are important to consider in every partnership. The more stuff takes center stage and emotional well-being takes a backseat, the more communication erodes, conflicts don’t get resolved, and responsiveness to each other is diminished.
Instead, try focusing on aspects of your partnership that don’t center on materialistic goods. Make handmade gifts for each other for an anniversary or plan a trip so you create memories that last a lifetime. Your relationship will be better off when you stop focusing so much on money and you focus more on each other.
Make Important Financial Decisions Together
You probably aren’t going to go out and buy a car or a house without help from your spouse, but surprisingly, financial infidelity is common in many marriages.
Spouses worry about being judged by their significant others for purchases they make, so they hide those purchases and tuck away credit card bills. Unsurprisingly, this kind of secrecy makes for a bad partnership.
Determine a monetary threshold for discussing purchases. It might be $50 or it might be $500, depending on your income and your individual comfort levels. Anything over that amount must be run by each other before a purchase is made. That way, you never have to worry about that TV being magically replaced or your spouse hiding designer boots in the closet.
Talk About How Different Incomes Affect Relationship Dynamics
When the male makes more than the female in a relationship, things tend to go relatively smoothly. When the female makes more, things can get ugly fast.
It’s important to acknowledge hurt feelings on both sides, and it’s important to understand that this dynamic can be difficult for some men to come to terms with. It can come with higher rates of infidelity and lower life satisfaction. Talking about these feelings is the first step to overcoming them.
Get Help
Nearly every relationship can benefit from a little outside help. It might mean discussing your concerns with a trusted friend or family member, but it may also mean getting professional help.
Don’t automatically assume that you need a marriage counselor if you and your spouse are having disagreements about money. If every other area of your lives seems to be in order, you may need a financial counselor instead. They can provide you with money tips that will take the stress off of your relationship.
Hiring an accountant to deal with some of your accounts can be helpful as well. That way, you don’t have to nag your significant other to check statements, transfer money, or write checks.
Money doesn’t have to be the reason why your relationship withers and dies. With the right approach, it can actually strengthen your relationship. Follow the tips on this list and you can create a bright, secure financial future that both you and your spouse can get behind.
