The Secrets People Share in Private

What Do People Actually Say About Themselves on Sexting and Phone Sex Platforms That They Won’t Say in Real Life?

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The huge popularity of webcam, phone sex, and sexting platforms shows that for a lot of people, indulging in some sexy fantasy time can often be something where they want a more interactive experience than they get by just watching porn or reading erotica.

Why Communications Based Adult Services Have Grown So Popular

While phone sex lines are nothing new, before the internet the market and culture around using them were very different. People had to worry about their calls to premium rate phone sex numbers showing up on their family phone bills, for example, and had to find numbers for these services in magazines. Nowadays they are able to connect to someone offering exactly the type of fantasy they want to talk about easily, instantly and privately.

Text-based services have made this kind of thing available to people who are embarrassed about talking about their fantasies out loud and would rather type them, or who have trouble finding the privacy to make these types of voice calls.

Webcam and photo sexting services allow users to get visual stimulation from the people they are talking to as well, and it is up to them whether it’s a two-way thing, or they themselves choose not to show themselves and to only see the pictures or feeds of the person they’re talking to. This can add a lot of realism and assurance to the users because there were always those jokes back in the ‘90s that the phone sex operators were never really who they said they were!

All of these advancements have made adult services where the customer gets to actually communicate with someone, rather than just passively watching videos or reading stories, available to a wider range of people, and also meant that people who want to work in the industry can easily be connected with people who are looking for the kind of chat they want to offer.

Anonymity on Adult Platforms

People who use sexting platforms and similar services now come from all walks of life and include both men and women. Working on these platforms has become a viable job option for people – especially women, who want a job where they can work online, and who find the idea of working in a sex-related role fun and appealing, but who want to do it in a safe way. As a result, both customers and workers tend to really value their anonymity. Leading sexting platform Arousr have policies in place that make it clear that users of the service, and their workers, should not expect to ever arrange to meet up in person. There are dating services for people who want to find partners in ‘the real world’, but on adult services like this, the idea is more for there to be a place where people can freely flirt, have some consequence-free fun, and explore the fantasies they may not want anyone they know in real life – even potential partners – to know about.

Getting Personal

However, while the anonymity granted by these types of services is part of what gives them their appeal and value, it does seem that when a lot of people use them, they do still want to ‘be themselves’ – just themselves in a safe environment where they won’t be judged for what turns them on!

In an interview with one of Arousr’s sexting girls, the sext service worker said that a lot of the time, her customers – who she thinks of as friends after she has built up an online bond with them from chatting – don’t actually end up being sexual:

Lots of my chats aren’t sexual in nature! I’ve had awesome conversations about music, Pokémon, books, sports, art, etc. I’m happy that my profile catches the attention of customers who are actually interested in the same things as I am.’

It is well documented that some people who use webcam and sexting services do enjoy the chat aspect of these services, which is why they tend to keep going back to the same service providers, who they have got a rapport with and have talked to before. While the freedom to talk sexually and explore the ideas that might not be something they feel good about discussing with people who know them in real life, or which they wouldn’t want people they associate with professionally to know about is important, people choose people to do this with who they also find fun to interact with on a more normal, social level. Some people keep returning to chat to someone they only know through these platforms for years, becoming friends and confidants, so it is understandable that often the conversations aren’t 100% flirting or explicit talk.

The Freedom to be Honest

This freedom to chat openly due to anonymity can certainly lead people to being more honest. This is not something that is restricted to people’s sex fantasies, either. Having a pseudonym or anonymous online persona is a kind of freedom most people have experienced in one way or another, or at least seen the consequences in terms of what other people will say online when nobody can link it back to their real-world selves.

Some people use the freedom of internet anonymity to say what they really think, if they have controversial opinions they don’t like to voice in public. Others use things like pen names to write blogs or even books about topics they don’t really want everyone to know they are interested in. Some people use anonymity to let off steam and get angry about things, which can sometimes become harmful.

Whatever the reason from all of these, it is when people are safe in the knowledge that their identity is a secret that they feel they can be truly honest, and this is perhaps one of the biggest changes the internet has given society – in the past, people didn’t have these kinds of outlets and tended to feel guilty about the things they wouldn’t want people in their lives to know.

Now, everybody can live out the secret parts of their lives without having to repress themselves or feel ashamed.

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