A breakup is an unpleasant thing, surely, but many women make it a lot worse by succumbing to various post-breakup urges. An onrush of hard feelings like anger or hurt makes us ladies behave in many ways that we can regret when we have calmed down. It’s worth making a mental note of things you definitely shouldn’t do when your relationship is fast going to the rocks.
1. Don’t rely on eating
This is what really seems to bring on some kind of relief as you indulge in something sweet you’d better avoid. Nevertheless, think again. The relief you may be getting will be very short-lived, but after a while you may find your clothes are getting tighter! Make overeating a no-no however bad you may be in need of some comfort.
2. Don’t ask him to come back
Here’s another important piece of advice. Don’t even think of begging him to reconsider and return. It is practically guaranteed to fail and leave you in a worse state than ever. It will be nothing more than a desperate act which will never really appeal to a man. If you really want him, and can’t help saying it, at least don’t let it sound like begging. It’s he who should be doing this, you know.
3. Don’t work yourself up thinking your life is at an end
While you’re certainly striving under some hurting pressure, it can produce a very vivid feeling that everything is over. Keep reminding yourself that you will regain control of your life, you have the guts to get over it and walk out on the sunny side of life.
4. Don’t shut yourself up
You need some peace to be alone and cry out all your tears, but never allow yourself to remain shut up in your room for too long. You’ve shut yourself up to take some time out, not to brood and pine. If pining sets in, take a firm step and walk out. Nobody expects you to pretend that everything’s all right, but an isolation that is too long won’t cure you, either.
5. Don’t refuse to discuss it with those you trust
When hit by a breakup, better do it both ways: stay alone for some periods letting the storm inside subside, and get sympathy and support from your family and friends. They must be worrying about you and would like to ease your load – why not allow them to do it? It may be just what you needed, though you don’t know it.
6. Don’t rush into rebound dates
As soon as you’re out of relationship, you will want to make rebound moves, go on dates not because you like the guy but rather to spite your ex? Once again, it will hardly be worth it. Your mind won’t be on building new relationship, and your date will probably feel it. You can expect to get much better support from friends.
7. Don’t be vindictive
Yes, you may feel like expressing your spite, especially if you feel badly wronged, but you know eventually it won’t look good. You will look ugly, and that’s all there will be to it. You show your nasty side and thus only strengthen the impression that you’re better out of their lives. Far better it would be to show resistance and self-control – it will prove much more impressive!
All these are negative pieces of advice, but there are many things that help us snap out of this grief and sorrow. Are there any sure ways to come back alive after a devastating breakup that you know and can share?