I agree, be yourself. I like to talk, but not during sex play. Before and after is fine. Otherwise, I stay sub-vocal. Done right, you can communicate alot without ever saying a word and often your partner will mimic you. Think Tim Allen as the tool man and you get the idea.

I’d also say go slow and be tender depending on your partner. I’ve met shy women who laid their like lumps because they were scared and didn’t know what to do. Maybe they were virgins or they’d had a string of selfish, ignorant lovers. One thought she was broken because she’d never had an orgasm while with a sex partner.(And I know this because I asked her to break Rule #2 and tell me.) But if you’re patient, under the shyness you may find an eager and willing partner. Guide their hands, give them sub-vocal encouragement when they do something you like, and stay playful.

What can you accomplish with this? Remember the shy, broken girl? That same night, several hours later, she turned into growling, sexy wildcat. She came twice that night, the second time so hard I though her nails were going to draw blood from my back. *grin* And no, I didn’t start out saying “I’m going to make her orgasm” I simply paid attention, found all the things that excited her, made her feel safe and feel like she could do nothing wrong, and the rest she did all by herself. After she regained her self confidence it was easy to teach her what I liked so she was a very good lover for me too.